SECRET Reason Narcissist Devalues, Discards YOU
Prof. Sam Vaknin・23 minutes read
The text explores the complex behavior of narcissists, delving into devaluation, discard, and replacement in relationships, revealing the internal abuse and manipulation they inflict on their partners. It also discusses how narcissists aim to recreate conflicts with their biological mother during childhood, using their intimate partner as a maternal figure to achieve separation and individuation through devaluation and discard.
Insights
- Narcissists devalue and discard partners as a way to recreate conflicts with their biological mother, viewing their partner as a maternal figure and aiming to achieve separation and individuation through abusive behavior.
- The abuse inflicted by narcissists is internal, focusing on taking over the inner critic and ego functions of their partners, turning them into a reflection of the narcissist's empty core, ultimately leading to devaluation and discard in the relationship.
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Recent questions
Why do narcissists devalue and discard partners?
Narcissists devalue and discard partners as a way to recreate conflicts with their biological mother during childhood. By viewing their intimate partner as a maternal figure, they attempt to achieve separation and individuation through devaluation and discard. This behavior stems from unresolved issues with their mother and a desire to rectify past conflicts, leading to a cycle of abuse and manipulation in relationships.
How do narcissists view their intimate partners?
Narcissists view their intimate partners as maternal figures, aiming to achieve separation and individuation through devaluation and discard. By recreating conflicts with their biological mother during childhood, they project unresolved issues onto their partners and seek to rectify past conflicts. This distorted view of their partners as maternal figures contributes to the cycle of abuse and manipulation in narcissistic relationships.
What role does the inner critic play in narcissistic abuse?
The inner critic in narcissistic abuse is taken over by the narcissist, who implants themselves as the exclusive inner critic of their partner. By constantly criticizing and devaluing their partner, the narcissist aims to control and manipulate their thoughts and behaviors. This harsh, unforgiving inner critic serves as a tool for the narcissist to maintain power and dominance in the relationship, leading to emotional abuse and psychological manipulation.
How do narcissists manipulate their partners' thoughts and behaviors?
Narcissists manipulate their partners' thoughts and behaviors by taking over their inner critic and ego functions. By entraining their partners and turning them into internal objects, narcissists make their partners feel controlled and puppetized. This manipulation aims to maintain power and dominance over their partners, leading to a cycle of abuse and emotional manipulation in narcissistic relationships.
What influences mental health disorders like narcissistic personality disorder?
Mental health disorders like narcissistic personality disorder are influenced by various factors, including the period in history, culture, and society in which individuals live. The transition from reality to the metaverse, mirroring past transitions like urbanization, can lead to adverse outcomes such as increased narcissism and psychopathy. These external factors play a role in shaping and exacerbating mental health disorders like narcissistic personality disorder, highlighting the complex interplay between individual psychology and societal influences.
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Summary
00:00
"Narcissists: Devaluation, Discard, and Replacement in Relationships"
- The text delves into the mysterious behavior of narcissists, focusing on devaluation, discard, and replacement in relationships.
- It questions why narcissists devalue and discard partners, even when they exhibit perfect behavior.
- The author, Sam Vaknin, reveals the secret reason behind narcissists' actions, hinting at a dialogue with Richard Grenon in Prague.
- Men are using artificial intelligence chatbots to create virtual girlfriends, abusing them, and boasting about it, showcasing the incidental role of victims in abusive relationships.
- The relationship with a narcissist aims to recreate conflicts with their biological mother during childhood, seeking to rectify past issues.
- The narcissist views their intimate partner as a maternal figure, attempting to achieve separation and individuation through devaluation and discard.
- The narcissist's abuse is internal, not relational, with victims being replaceable symbols in their mind.
- The narcissist acts as a ventriloquist, attributing their own thoughts to internal objects representing others, leading to confusion and gaslighting.
- The external partner is replaced by an internal object in the narcissist's mind, erasing the true individual and creating a distorted representation.
- The narcissist also takes over the inner critic of their partner, influencing their thoughts and behaviors in a manipulative manner.
21:45
"Narcissists Control Inner Critic, Inducing Self-Destruction"
- Narcissists take over your inner critic, turning it into a harsh, unforgiving, and self-destructive super ego.
- The narcissist implants themselves as your exclusive inner critic, criticizing you constantly to devalue and discard you.
- The narcissist goes through three phases: converting you into an internal object, taking over your inner critic to torture you, and devaluing you to separate and individuate from you.
- The narcissist entrains you by taking over your inner critic and ego functions, making you feel controlled and puppetized.
- The narcissist renders you a reflection of their own empty core, making you feel like your life is determined by them.
- The narcissist plays the roles of victim and mother in their script, devaluing and discarding you to separate from you.
- Mental health disorders like narcissistic personality disorder are influenced by the period in history, culture, and society you live in.
- The transition from reality to the metaverse mirrors past transitions like urbanization, leading to adverse outcomes like increased narcissism and psychopathy.
