Why the INFJ Ruins Relationships
Frank James・9 minutes read
INFJs struggle in relationships due to their controlling nature driven by their need for abstract patterns and concepts, leading to a false sense of security. To improve relationships, INFJs must learn to let go of control, accept people as they are, and love unconditionally by allowing individuals to exist without trying to mold them into preconceived patterns.
Insights
- INFJs' controlling nature in relationships stems from their tendency to distill people into abstract patterns to maintain a sense of control, often leading to conflict when individuals deviate from these constructed patterns.
- To enhance relationships, INFJs need to relinquish control, accept others as they are, and practice unconditional love by allowing individuals to exist without imposing preconceived abstract molds on them.
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Recent questions
How do INFJs tend to ruin their relationships?
INFJs ruin their relationships due to their controlling nature, which is more internal and abstract rather than overtly bossy. Their dominant function of introverted intuition leads them to distill people and situations into abstract patterns and concepts to feel in control. This preference for dealing with abstract forms rather than messy reality gives them a false sense of security, turning people into abstract objects in their minds to maintain control and avoid unpredictability.
What causes conflict in relationships for INFJs?
Conflict arises in relationships for INFJs when individuals deviate from the patterns they have constructed in their minds. This deviation leads to overreactions and anxiety as INFJs struggle to accept changes in others and feel threatened when their perceptions are challenged. The need for control and the discomfort with the concrete world without subjective meaning, due to their inferior function of extroverted sensing, can cause strife in relationships.
How can INFJs improve their relationships?
To improve relationships, INFJs must let go of control and accept people as they are. They need to love unconditionally by allowing individuals to exist without trying to mold them into preconceived patterns. By embracing the messy reality of human unpredictability and letting go of the need for control, INFJs can foster healthier and more fulfilling relationships based on acceptance and understanding.
What is the dominant function of INFJs?
The dominant function of INFJs is introverted intuition, which leads them to distill people and situations into abstract patterns and concepts to feel in control. This internal and abstract nature of their dominant function influences how INFJs perceive and interact with the world, often turning individuals into abstract objects in their minds to maintain a sense of control.
Why do INFJs struggle with accepting changes in others?
INFJs struggle with accepting changes in others because they feel threatened when their perceptions are challenged. Their tendency to turn people into abstract objects in their minds to maintain control leads to discomfort when individuals deviate from the patterns they have constructed. This struggle to accept changes and the need for control can cause conflict and strife in relationships for INFJs.
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Summary
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INFJs: Control and Abstract Patterns in Relationships
- INFJs tend to ruin their relationships due to their controlling nature, which is more internal and abstract rather than overtly bossy.
- Their dominant function, introverted intuition, leads them to distill people and situations into abstract patterns and concepts to feel in control.
- INFJs prefer dealing with abstract forms rather than the messy reality of individuals, which gives them a false sense of security.
- Their inferior function, extroverted sensing, involves observing the concrete world without subjective meaning, causing discomfort for INFJs.
- In relationships, INFJs turn people into abstract objects in their minds to maintain control and avoid the chaos of human unpredictability.
- Conflict arises when individuals deviate from the patterns INFJs have constructed, leading to overreactions and anxiety.
- INFJs struggle to accept changes in others, feeling threatened when their perceptions are challenged, causing strife in relationships.
- To improve relationships, INFJs must let go of control, accept people as they are, and love unconditionally by allowing individuals to exist without trying to mold them into preconceived patterns.
