The Motivation Expert: Why You're FAILING To Achieve Your Goals (& What To Do About It!)

Jay Shetty Podcast81 minutes read

Understanding one's "why" is crucial for setting goals and overcoming obstacles, with a focus on self-reflection and self-compassion in personal growth. It is essential to prioritize peace, creativity, and self-acceptance, embracing the balance between insignificance and significance to lead a fulfilling life.

Insights

  • Understanding one's "why" is crucial for goal-setting and overcoming obstacles, emphasizing the importance of clarity and motivation in pursuing actions.
  • The significance of embracing emotions of success alongside fear, highlighting the need to explore and process feelings to navigate personal growth effectively.
  • Balancing the insignificance and significance of one's actions can lead to a fulfilling and stress-free life, emphasizing the importance of perspective and self-acceptance.

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Recent questions

  • How can one overcome fears and obstacles?

    By understanding their "why" and working through challenges.

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Summary

00:00

"Unlocking Success: Embrace Fear, Build Habits"

  • The importance of understanding one's "why" when setting goals is emphasized, with a strong "why" being crucial for overcoming obstacles.
  • The responsibility to work through challenges, even if not at fault, is highlighted.
  • Encouragement to explore feelings of success alongside fear is provided.
  • A call to action to subscribe to a podcast for habit-building and self-improvement is made.
  • The significance of identifying and addressing fears, particularly primal and intellectual fears, is discussed.
  • The impact of projecting fears into the future on one's present state is explained.
  • A strategy to combat intellectual fears by envisioning positive outcomes is shared.
  • The three-step process of awareness, practice, and repetition for overcoming fears is outlined.
  • An example of changing a judgmental thought pattern through conscious effort and positive reinforcement is given.
  • The importance of self-compassion and grace in the process of personal growth and change is emphasized.

11:49

"Repetitive thoughts shape success and failure"

  • Success and failure in life are determined by our most repeated thoughts.
  • Many people are unaware of their most repeated thought, often negative in nature.
  • Thoughts are often repetitive, just presented in different forms.
  • Being aware of our thoughts and choosing them effectively is crucial.
  • Meditation is about becoming aware of our thoughts, not eliminating them.
  • Silence helps in increasing awareness and finding answers.
  • Evaluating repetitive thoughts is essential to determine their usefulness.
  • Procrastination is often driven by a lack of a strong "why."
  • Motivation is fleeting, while being driven is rooted in a strong purpose.
  • Discovering a strong "why" can provide clarity and motivation for action.

23:21

Journey towards coaching and self-discovery

  • The individual is contemplating their future career path, considering Sales Management, Amazon business, or coaching.
  • They feel drawn towards coaching and helping people change their lives.
  • Despite fears and uncertainties, they are motivated by the idea of making a positive impact.
  • A pivotal moment in 2015 involved a message from their deceased father, urging them to live with courage, love, and laughter.
  • This message inspired them to commit fully to their chosen path, despite financial concerns and fears.
  • They reflect on the pursuit of material success and recognition, realizing that true fulfillment comes from within.
  • They emphasize the importance of constant self-reflection and healing to address past traumas and avoid unhealthy coping mechanisms.
  • The individual acknowledges their workaholic tendencies as a way to avoid processing emotions and stresses the need for balance and self-care.
  • They highlight the significance of creating systems and processes in their business to prioritize personal time for reflection and growth.
  • The conversation shifts to the importance of humility, continuous learning, and the ongoing journey towards self-discovery and spiritual growth.

35:57

Embracing Emotional Release and Spiritual Growth

  • Being silent brings up anxiety, pushing to move on to the next task, but realizing the need to sit with emotions and release them.
  • Watching videos of a polar bear and an impala releasing stress through convulsions and deep breaths, highlighting the importance of processing trauma and emotions.
  • Encouraging the release of emotions through methods like adult temper tantrums in a safe space or sitting in silence to allow natural emotional release.
  • Comparing emotional release to squeezing an orange, where pressure brings out what's inside, emphasizing the body's natural intelligence in letting go.
  • Embracing curiosity towards anxious feelings or tears, inspired by teachings of Krishnamurti to learn about oneself in the present moment.
  • Reflecting on the concept of identity and the soul's choice in life, shifting from victimhood to gratitude and detachment from external factors.
  • Seeking connection to the internal truth that remains constant amidst life's changes, finding peace and improved relationships through this connection.
  • Balancing spiritual development with worldly responsibilities, achieving goals without being consumed by fears and limiting beliefs.
  • Recognizing the importance of connecting with a deeper sense within oneself to navigate stress and anxiety, shifting focus from the mind to the heart.
  • Embracing the idea of simultaneous oneness and duality, acknowledging the current reality while understanding a greater reality beyond it.

48:15

Embracing Balance: Significance and Insignificance in Life

  • Finding a balance between recognizing the significance and insignificance of one's actions is crucial for mental well-being.
  • Acknowledging the importance and lack of importance of one's life simultaneously is essential for maintaining a healthy perspective.
  • Embracing the duality of believing in the significance and insignificance of one's actions can lead to a more fulfilling and stress-free life.
  • Rediscovering the joy and fun in life, similar to how children experience it, can help alleviate stress and pressure.
  • Cultivating creativity requires creating space for ideas to flow naturally, often found in moments of silence and reflection.
  • Limiting distractions, such as excessive phone use, can help in reconnecting with one's true self and fostering creativity.
  • Recognizing the insignificance of life in the grand scheme of the universe can provide a sense of freedom and perspective.
  • Prioritizing peace and presence over external distractions like social media and entertainment can lead to a more fulfilling life.
  • Starting from a place of peace and stillness can enhance clarity, perspective, and effectiveness in one's endeavors.
  • Learning to love and accept all aspects of oneself, including perceived flaws, can lead to greater self-compassion and personal growth.

01:00:41

Embracing all aspects for personal growth.

  • Every aspect of oneself, good or bad, can be utilized by acknowledging and engaging it in higher service to purify it.
  • Ignoring or fighting against unwanted aspects of oneself only strengthens them, while engaging them in service to others or personal growth leads to purification.
  • Learning the hard lesson that one cannot accomplish everything alone and the importance of trusting and asking for help from others.
  • Overcoming a lifetime of feeling neglected and developing a mindset of self-reliance to understanding the strength in asking for help and trusting others.
  • The best advice received was that everything in one's life is their responsibility, emphasizing the importance of taking ownership and being the CEO of one's life.
  • The worst advice was to fit in with everybody else, implying conformity over individuality.
  • The most repeated thought recently is "I'm proud of you," a self-affirmation inspired by childhood experiences.
  • The number one habit that changed life was daily meditation, breathwork, and finding space for oneself, promoting self-awareness and growth.
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