Jay & His Wife Radhi ON: The BIGGEST LIE About Love & 3 Things To Look For In A Partner

Jay Shetty Podcast73 minutes read

Jay Shetty and his wife, Ravi Devluk, discuss their relationship, challenges, and wins on the "On Purpose" podcast, highlighting the importance of empowering partners to navigate life independently. They emphasize that relationships require constant growth, understanding, and authenticity, focusing on mutual support, shared experiences, and fostering personal fulfillment over material success.

Insights

  • Relationships should focus on empowering individuals to heal themselves rather than constantly fixing them, fostering self-love and growth within each partner.
  • Genuine connections require authenticity, shared experiences, and continuous efforts towards personal and mutual development, emphasizing the importance of open communication, supportive feedback, and quality time spent together.

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Recent questions

  • How can relationships be strengthened?

    Relationships can be strengthened by focusing on growth, learning together, and authenticity. It is essential to empower each other to navigate life independently rather than fixing them. Celebrating achievements, providing honest feedback, and supporting personal growth are key aspects. Quality time spent together, engaging in meaningful activities, and fostering deep connections through shared experiences are vital. Regular communication, honesty about needs, and setting relationship goals contribute to a healthy and strong bond. Embracing imperfections, sharing challenges, and avoiding misconceptions about always being positive are crucial for relationship growth and development.

  • What role does communication play in relationships?

    Communication plays a pivotal role in relationships as it allows partners to understand each other's argument processing styles, resolve conflicts, and deepen connections. Regular check-ins, honest conversations about needs, and setting goals together enhance communication. Different approaches to handling arguments, such as venting or exploding, should be understood to navigate conflicts effectively. Choosing what energy to share, being authentic, and engaging in open dialogue foster trust and understanding in relationships. Quality communication leads to mutual support, growth, and a deeper connection between partners.

  • How can partners support each other's growth?

    Partners can support each other's growth by providing honest feedback, celebrating achievements, and pushing for excellence. It is crucial to empower each other to find their own solutions, develop their voice, and navigate personal decisions. Encouraging physical fitness, reducing sugar intake, and guiding through periods of uncertainty contribute to growth. Supporting personal endeavors, sharing experiences, and fostering curiosity and laughter strengthen the bond between partners. Acknowledging hard work, setting goals together, and investing time in the relationship are essential for nurturing growth and development.

  • What activities can enhance chemistry in relationships?

    Engaging in activities like escape rooms, extreme sports, and problem-solving tasks can enhance chemistry and communication in relationships. Meaningful interactions, shared experiences, and new exciting activities deepen connections and foster curiosity and laughter. Traditional date nights may not be as effective as engaging in activities that allow for mutual interests and connection. Building a deeper connection involves exploring and discovering each other through adventurous and problem-solving activities. Quality time spent together, engaging in shared experiences, and fostering a sense of adventure contribute to enhancing chemistry in relationships.

  • Why is authenticity important in relationships?

    Authenticity is crucial in relationships as it allows partners to embrace imperfections, share challenges, and avoid misconceptions about always being positive. Being genuine, honest, and open fosters trust, understanding, and deeper connections. Authenticity leads to mutual support, growth, and learning together in a relationship. Celebrating achievements, acknowledging hard work, and investing time in nurturing the bond are essential aspects of authentic relationships. Embracing imperfections, sharing experiences, and fostering organic connections through open communication contribute to a strong and healthy relationship.

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Summary

00:00

"Jay Shetty and wife discuss relationship dynamics"

  • Relationships can make someone feel broken if you keep fixing them instead of teaching them to heal themselves.
  • Loving someone means helping them fall more in love with themselves.
  • Jay Shetty hosts the number one Health and Wellness podcast, "On Purpose."
  • Jay Shetty's guest, Ravi Devluk, is his wife and a hard-to-book guest.
  • They discuss their relationship, challenges, and wins on the podcast.
  • They answer questions from Jay's team, providing genuine and raw insights.
  • They discuss what they loved about each other at the beginning of their relationship and how it has evolved.
  • They reflect on their relationship amidst major life changes like moving countries, states, and homes.
  • They share how they have maintained their connection and support through these changes.
  • They explore the dynamics of their relationship roles as parents, partners, and children, particularly in relation to food choices.

13:13

Partner's Support Shapes Speaker's Journey to Independence

  • The speaker's mother fed them four chocolate products daily during their childhood: chocolate biscuit, chocolate yogurt, chocolate bar, and chocolate ice cream, leading to addiction.
  • The speaker's partner has been helping them reduce sugar intake and navigate through periods of uncertainty and self-discovery.
  • The partner is described as a guiding figure, not imposing decisions but assisting the speaker in finding their own path.
  • The partner is likened to a parent in certain situations, especially during moments of self-doubt and confusion.
  • The partner has encouraged the speaker to exercise more and has been instrumental in their physical fitness journey.
  • The partner's approach involves teaching the speaker to find their own solutions rather than providing immediate answers.
  • The speaker emphasizes the importance of not fixing others but empowering them to navigate life independently.
  • The partner is commended for helping the speaker develop their own voice and navigate personal decisions.
  • The speaker reflects on the significance of not portraying a perfect image in relationships and the value of sharing challenges and imperfections.
  • The speaker and their partner discuss occasional irritations in their relationship, highlighting differences in communication styles and approaches to conflict resolution.

25:53

Navigating Relationships: Growth Over Perfection

  • Relationships require constant growth and transition, not perfection.
  • Misconceptions arise about always being positive and happy.
  • Choosing what energy to share with others is crucial.
  • Different approaches to handling arguments: venting, hiding, exploding.
  • Understanding each other's argument processing styles is key to resolving conflicts.
  • Perceptions of caring more or less in relationships can be misleading.
  • Striving for perfection is a common human desire.
  • Perfection doesn't equate to happiness; it's about finding personal fulfillment.
  • Building authentic relationships requires time, effort, and authenticity.
  • Relationships should focus on growth and learning together, not just entertainment.

38:41

"Partners as Gurus: Supporting Growth and Connection"

  • Gurus are not figures that make you feel inferior but rather believe in your potential and value.
  • In relationships, it's common to be critical of your partner, but it's crucial to see their potential.
  • Partners should support each other's growth and not focus solely on material success.
  • Partners can act as Gurus by providing honest feedback and pushing for excellence.
  • Celebrating and acknowledging the hard work behind achievements is essential.
  • Quality of time spent together is more important than quantity in relationships.
  • Romance should not be limited to traditional ideas but can involve adventurous and problem-solving activities.
  • Engaging in activities like escape rooms or extreme sports can enhance chemistry and communication in relationships.
  • Meaningful interactions and shared experiences are vital for deepening connections in relationships.
  • Regularly engaging in new and exciting activities can strengthen relationships and foster curiosity and laughter.

51:20

"Deepening Connections Through Shared Interests"

  • In old relationships, typical date nights were the norm, but now, avoiding them is preferred.
  • Watching movies or TV shows together doesn't equate to bonding or deepening the connection.
  • To build a deeper connection, engaging in activities that allow for mutual interests and connection is crucial.
  • When first dating, the focus was on finding someone to grow spiritually with and share laughter.
  • Having a strict list of criteria for a partner may limit potential connections and overlook emotional compatibility.
  • Relationships should be about discovering and exploring a person rather than fitting them into a predetermined list.
  • Being busy in a relationship requires daily check-ins and quality time spent together.
  • Spending quality time together after being apart for a while is essential for reconnection and relationship growth.
  • Monthly check-ins and annual reflections with partners are vital for maintaining and strengthening relationships.
  • Being honest about needs and making time for daily communication is key to sustaining a healthy relationship.

01:03:46

"Nurturing Relationships Through Communication and Growth"

  • The book recommends asking four questions regularly: daily - what have you done for yourself, weekly - what's coming up and what support is needed, quarterly - is the relationship going as desired and how to improve it, yearly - what are the goals and how to assist. These questions aim to provide clarity and direction in relationships.
  • The importance of setting goals and investing in the relationship is highlighted, especially after a period of busyness. Traveling together, spending quality time, and scheduling moments for connection are emphasized as crucial for nurturing the relationship.
  • The conversation reflects on growth, gratitude, and the journey of learning together in a relationship. The commitment to supporting each other's endeavors, sharing experiences, and fostering growth is evident, emphasizing the value of open communication and organic connections in relationships.
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