Why perfectionists become depressed | Dr Keith Gaynor
Aware・36 minutes read
Perfectionism can lead to self-criticism, low self-esteem, and mental health issues, with high achievers often feeling their accomplishments are never enough. Keith highlights the negative impact of perfectionism on depression and recommends flexible goals, self-appreciation, and incremental progress to combat self-criticism and foster a positive self-image.
Insights
- Perfectionism, when taken to extremes, can lead to increased risks of depression, anxiety, and other mental health issues due to setting excessively high standards and engaging in self-criticism, impacting mood and overall well-being.
- Embracing flexible standards, recognizing and appreciating achievements, and balancing hard work with self-care are essential in combating self-criticism, fostering a positive self-image, and maintaining mental well-being, crucial for managing obstacles effectively.
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Recent questions
What is the link between perfectionism and depression?
Perfectionism can lead to increased risks of depression.
How can perfectionism impact one's well-being?
Perfectionism can lead to emotional worry, physical fatigue, and poor sleep.
What are the signs of clinical perfectionism?
Clinical perfectionism can result in increased risks of depression and anxiety.
How can one combat perfectionism?
Embracing flexible standards and acknowledging imperfections can lead to a healthier mindset.
What are the consequences of perfectionism on self-esteem?
Perfectionism often leads to self-criticism and low self-esteem, impacting mood and overall well-being.
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Summary
00:00
Perfectionism's Link to Depression and Anxiety
- Keith, a psychologist and therapist, works extensively with individuals dealing with anxiety and depression.
- He notes that many high achievers struggle with feeling their accomplishments are never enough due to perfectionism.
- Keith aims to discuss the link between perfectionism and depression, highlighting how this mindset can be detrimental.
- Perfectionists often set excessively high standards, leading to self-criticism and low self-esteem.
- Clinical perfectionism, when taken to extremes, can result in increased risks of depression, anxiety, and other mental health issues.
- Keith recommends a book by Roz Afrin, "Overcoming Perfectionism," as a helpful resource for those struggling with this trait.
- Perfectionism can lead to emotional worry, physical fatigue, poor sleep, cognitive rumination, and behavioral patterns like procrastination.
- The paradox of perfectionism is that the more one achieves, the worse they may feel about themselves due to unattainable standards.
- Perfectionism often stems from low self-esteem, rigid standards, and the tendency to self-criticize regardless of task outcomes.
- Perfectionists tend to criticize themselves whether they complete a task, fail to meet standards, or avoid the task altogether, leading to a continuous cycle of self-doubt and lowered self-esteem.
15:33
Striving for Perfection: Impact and Solutions
- Many individuals strive to be perfect parents, but the rigidity of this standard can lead to feelings of failure when faced with challenges like a misbehaving toddler in public.
- Criticizing oneself for not meeting the impossible standard of perfection can lead to negative self-perception and avoidance of situations that may highlight imperfections.
- Perfectionism often leads to self-criticism and low self-esteem, impacting mood and overall well-being.
- Setting rigid goals and standards can create internal conflict when competing priorities arise, causing stress and feelings of inadequacy.
- Goals should be flexible and realistic, allowing for ups and downs without harsh self-judgment.
- Perfectionism stems from a dissatisfaction with oneself and a belief that nothing is ever good enough, leading to a constant pursuit of unattainable standards.
- Recognizing and appreciating one's achievements, even if not unique or perfect, can help combat self-criticism and foster a positive self-image.
- Avoidance and procrastination often stem from the fear of not achieving perfection, leading individuals to avoid tasks altogether rather than risk failure.
- Balancing hard work with self-care is essential to prevent burnout and maintain mental well-being.
- Embracing flexible standards and acknowledging that perfection is unattainable can lead to a healthier mindset and improved self-esteem.
31:21
Overcoming fear and self-criticism for success.
- Fear of failure can hinder progress and reinforce negative beliefs about oneself, leading to low self-esteem.
- Ways to avoid tasks include getting busy with other tasks, blaming external factors, or feeling overwhelmed by the issue.
- Anxiety is a normal part of starting something new, but taking the first step is crucial despite the fear of failure.
- Gradually chipping away at tasks incrementally is key to achieving goals, even if anxiety and fear persist.
- Self-criticism, often stemming from perfectionism, can lead to relentless criticism, lowering self-esteem and hindering progress.
- Developing core confidence, where one recognizes their fundamental okayness even on bad days, is crucial in building a resilient self-esteem and managing obstacles effectively.
