No Sex Marriage – Masturbation, Loneliness, Cheating and Shame | Maureen McGrath | TEDxStanleyPark

TEDx Talks14 minutes read

Sex is a crucial element in marriages, with dissatisfaction often arising from lack of sexual activity. Factors like communication, education, and health play significant roles in maintaining a satisfying sex life within a marriage.

Insights

  • Dissatisfaction with sex lives is prevalent in marriages, even when overall relationship satisfaction is high, emphasizing the need for open communication and addressing sexual issues proactively.
  • The impact of various factors such as chemical changes in the brain, societal influences on sex education, and health conditions like erectile dysfunction underscores the complex nature of sexual dynamics in marriages, necessitating a holistic approach to maintain a healthy and fulfilling sexual relationship.

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Recent questions

  • How does sexual frequency change in marriages over time?

    Sexual frequency in marriages typically starts with couples having sex a little over once a week for the first decade, but decreases after that to about 58 times a year. Factors like exhaustion, distractions, and lack of initiation contribute to this decrease in sexual activity. It is essential for couples to communicate openly about their needs and desires to maintain a healthy sexual relationship as the marriage progresses.

  • What are the effects of technology on infidelity in marriages?

    Technology has made cheating more accessible in marriages, leading to online affairs through platforms like texting and sexting. Increased online communication heightens the chances of in-person encounters, making it easier for individuals to engage in infidelity. It is crucial for couples to establish boundaries regarding technology use and communication to prevent the temptation of cheating.

  • How does sex education impact sexual satisfaction in marriages?

    Sex education often instills fear in women, hindering their enjoyment of sex, while men's education is often influenced by internet pornography, lacking lessons on intimacy. This disparity in education can lead to dissatisfaction in sexual relationships. It is important for couples to engage in open and honest communication about their sexual desires and preferences to enhance their sexual satisfaction.

  • What are the signs of a sexless marriage?

    A sexless marriage is characterized by a lack of sexual activity between partners, leading to feelings of frustration, loneliness, and unattractiveness. Erectile dysfunction can also be a sign of underlying health issues that impact sexual desire and contribute to a sexless marriage. It is crucial for couples to address these issues through communication, seeking professional help if needed, to prevent further strain on the relationship.

  • How can couples revitalize a sexless marriage?

    To revitalize a sexless marriage, couples can prioritize daily physical activity for improved blood flow and sexual sensation. Addressing any sexual dysfunctions and focusing on intimate connection by setting guidelines for external attractions and resolving marital issues in the bedroom can also help reignite the spark in the relationship. It is essential for couples to communicate openly, seek support from professionals if necessary, and work together to strengthen their bond and improve their sexual relationship.

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Summary

00:00

Marital Sex: Impact on Relationships and Health

  • Sex is a contentious issue in marriages, with many couples going months or years without it, causing dissatisfaction.
  • A survey of 10,000 married men showed that 75% were satisfied in their relationships, but over 50% were dissatisfied with their sex lives.
  • Most couples have sex before marriage, leading to potential sexual boredom in the long run.
  • On average, married couples have sex a little over once a week for the first decade, decreasing after that to about 58 times a year.
  • Chemicals like PEA in the brain diminish after two years, affecting sexual frequency, highlighting the importance of communication in maintaining great sex.
  • Sex education often instills fear in women, hindering their enjoyment of sex, while men's education is often influenced by internet pornography, lacking intimacy lessons.
  • Women often believe that sexual interest precedes activity, but in reality, it's the other way around, prompting the need for more balanced sex education.
  • Factors like exhaustion, distractions, and lack of initiation contribute to decreased sexual activity in marriages.
  • Erectile dysfunction can be a sign of underlying health issues like cardiovascular disease or diabetes, impacting sexual desire and potentially leading to sexless marriages.
  • Sex is a crucial indicator of the state of a marriage, with those in sexless marriages reporting feelings of frustration, loneliness, and unattractiveness, which can have severe health implications.

17:19

"Cheating, DRD4 gene, and reviving marriage"

  • Technology has made cheating more accessible, leading to online affairs through platforms like texting and sexting, with increased online communication heightening the chances of in-person encounters.
  • The gene DRD4 has been linked to cheating, particularly thriving in sexless marriages, where a system of pleasure and reward can reignite the "love drug" PEA, perpetuating the cycle of infidelity.
  • To revitalize a sexless marriage, prioritize daily physical activity for improved blood flow and sexual sensation, address any sexual dysfunctions, and focus on intimate connection by setting guidelines for external attractions and resolving marital issues in the bedroom.
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