Make Them DESIRE YOU! - Easy Ways To Become More ATTRACTIVE TODAY | Stephan Speaks

Lewis Howes134 minutes read

Many people misuse the label of love to hide toxic behaviors and perceptions, while the walls you put up to protect yourself may also block blessings. Falling in love often happens quickly, not after months of knowing someone, with real connections often felt instantly with a strong initial engagement.

Insights

  • Love can be misused to cover up toxic behaviors, hindering genuine connections.
  • Instant recognition of true love and connections is possible, contrary to societal beliefs.
  • Healing from past traumas is crucial to avoid self-sabotage and emit positive energy.
  • Connection surpasses compatibility and chemistry, forming the foundation of fulfilling relationships.

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Recent questions

  • How can one recognize a toxic relationship?

    By understanding that love doesn't justify harmful behaviors.

  • Is it possible to find love instantly?

    Yes, real connections can be felt instantly.

  • How can one heal from past relationships?

    By acknowledging past hurts and releasing emotional baggage.

  • Why is communication important in relationships?

    Because effective communication fosters understanding and connection.

  • How can one build a strong connection in a relationship?

    By prioritizing genuine compatibility and chemistry.

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Summary

00:00

Recognizing True Love: Instant Connections, Healing, Growth

  • Many people misuse the label of love to hide toxic behaviors and perceptions.
  • The walls you put up to protect yourself may also block blessings.
  • Society falsely teaches that love takes time to identify, but in reality, it can be instant.
  • Falling in love often happens quickly, not after months of knowing someone.
  • Real connections are often felt instantly, with a strong initial engagement.
  • The spirit recognizes its match before the mind does, leading to intuition and gut feelings.
  • Fear is the main obstacle to accepting intuition and recognizing true connections.
  • Healing from past relationships is crucial to avoid self-sabotage in new relationships.
  • Meeting the right person at the wrong time is possible, but both parties need growth.
  • Healing is essential before engaging in sexual interactions to avoid distractions and potential issues.

14:47

Healing Negative Energy for Healthy Relationships

  • Negative thoughts and energy can't be hidden, affecting one's overall energy and interactions.
  • Unhealed individuals emit negative energy, deterring potential partners from committing.
  • Healing allows for better energy perception and attraction to healthier individuals.
  • Sex is crucial in relationships for bonding, connection, and satisfaction.
  • Lack of sexual satisfaction can lead to relationship issues and disconnect.
  • Open communication about sexual needs is essential for relationship health.
  • Healing from past hurts is vital before seeking a partner.
  • Acknowledging past hurts and releasing emotional baggage is crucial for healing.
  • Emotional detox through releasing pent-up emotions is necessary for healing.
  • Discovering oneself, exuding positive energy, and being authentic attract compatible partners.

28:35

Effective Communication and Overcoming Fear in Relationships

  • The key to communication is how it makes people feel, not just what is said.
  • Women often have walls up due to past hurts, hindering their ability to love and be loved.
  • Overcoming fear and embracing faith is crucial for success in relationships and business.
  • Women's detachment from their feminine energy can impact their success and happiness.
  • Being mindful of the energy you project is essential for approachability and comfort.
  • Having an accountability partner can help in recognizing and controlling negative energy.
  • Online dating can be a valuable tool, especially in current times of limited social interactions.
  • Building desire and presenting value in online dating profiles is crucial for success.
  • Including multiple photos, including full-body shots, is important to avoid misrepresentation.
  • Maintaining a positive and inviting tone in profiles is more effective than negativity.

42:27

Engaging Messages Spark Interest and Conversation

  • Sending simple messages to men can catch their interest and gauge their response.
  • Matthew Hussey suggests using techniques like eye contact or subtle flirtation to engage men.
  • Men should reference something from a woman's profile in their opening message to show genuine interest.
  • This approach sets men apart from generic messages and allows for a natural conversation to start.
  • Women can simply say hello in online dating, as men will respond based on their interest.
  • Men may be shy or socially awkward but will likely respond to messages, leading to further conversation.
  • Couples should discuss roles in marriage, align values, and communicate sexual expectations.
  • Financial values, physical appearance changes, and sexual needs should be openly discussed.
  • Women may not openly discuss attraction or sexual satisfaction in group settings but are more candid one-on-one.
  • Open relationships are viewed skeptically due to perceptions of unfulfillment and lack of successful monogamy.

56:17

Navigating Relationships: From Open to Monogamy

  • Open relationships can stem from past experiences of being cheated on in monogamous relationships, leading to a desire for emotional control and protection.
  • Some individuals in open relationships may still try to control the dynamics to suit their needs, indicating deeper issues at play.
  • Prioritize healing from past traumas before entering into open relationships to ensure genuine compatibility with the lifestyle.
  • Meeting someone with a profound connection can shift individuals from open relationships to monogamy unexpectedly.
  • Long-term relationships facing challenges should assess if a genuine connection ever existed before deciding on divorce or reconciliation.
  • Divorce may be necessary if there was never a true connection, as staying together for the sake of children can lead to more harm than good.
  • Children raised in dysfunctional households may struggle with relationships and trust due to skewed perceptions of love and marriage.
  • Creating a positive and loving environment is crucial for children's well-being, even if it means parting ways with a partner.
  • Dysfunction in relationships stems from unresolved personal issues, leading to normalized dysfunction in partnerships.
  • Effective communication, setting ground rules for disagreements, and maintaining respect are essential for healthy relationships and conflict resolution.

01:10:24

Building Strong Relationships for Thriving Careers and Lives

  • Strong relationships in corporate settings lead to thriving careers and companies
  • Positivity in personal lives enhances reaching true potential
  • Intimacy impacts career performance
  • Men should learn to look past women's words to understand their emotions
  • Women are skilled at reading emotions and moods, even when not explicitly expressed
  • Men should show genuine concern for women's feelings and be attentive to non-verbal cues
  • Women should clearly communicate their needs and desires to men
  • Men may not understand how women want to be loved, requiring clear communication
  • Compatibility involves traits that fit together, like interests and values
  • Chemistry is about getting along and working together, regardless of compatibility
  • Connection is a deep bond that can exist even without compatibility or chemistry
  • Connection is crucial for a fulfilling relationship, more than compatibility or chemistry
  • Connection cannot be forced or created artificially
  • Differences in interests can be positive in a relationship with a strong connection
  • A strong connection can lead to flexibility and compromise in dealing with differences
  • Balance in a relationship can be achieved with extreme connection, chemistry, and some compatibility
  • Finding someone with extreme connection, chemistry, and high compatibility is possible, leading to a well-rounded relationship.

01:25:05

"Balancing Energies in Relationships for Success"

  • In nature, there is a polarity that attracts masculine to feminine and vice versa, creating balance in relationships.
  • Healthy relationships thrive on opposite energies that complement each other, enhancing strengths and creating a stronger whole unit.
  • Tyson, a meat company, acquired Beyond Meat, a vegan option, to balance out their product offerings and grow in the market.
  • Rushing into sex on the first date may not derail a genuine connection, but waiting can increase the chances of success and understanding the connection better.
  • Building a strong connection with someone can lead to instant chemistry and a lasting relationship, as seen in personal experiences.
  • Men and women approach early sex differently, with women often overthinking and analyzing the situation more than men.
  • Rebound relationships can work if the new person surpasses the strongest feelings one had for a previous partner, ensuring a stronger connection.
  • Self-love, when genuine, is never a bad thing in relationships, but self-absorption, disguised as self-love, can be detrimental due to selfishness and lack of compromise.

01:39:38

Essential self-love practices for healthy relationships

  • Eating right is crucial for self-love, as unhealthy eating habits can worsen mood and energy levels.
  • Quality sleep is essential for positivity and productivity, emphasizing the need for a peaceful bedtime routine.
  • Setting boundaries in relationships is vital to prevent emotional drain and maintain self-preservation.
  • Engaging in enjoyable activities regularly is key to self-love, promoting happiness and relaxation.
  • Prayer and meditation in the morning can set a positive tone for the day, enhancing energy and clarity.
  • Effective communication is the most important skill before and during a relationship for success.
  • Recognizing when a relationship is over is necessary when one or both parties refuse to work on issues.
  • Self-love practices can be applied universally to all relationships, emphasizing communication and empathy.
  • Understanding differing perspectives and expressing frustrations calmly are crucial in all relationships.
  • Physical attraction distinguishes romantic relationships, but core principles of communication apply universally.

01:54:54

Mastering Relationships: Key to Personal Growth

  • Importance of learning to engage better with others, communicate effectively, and build strong relationships.
  • Core principles of relationships apply to all, regardless of age or gender.
  • Focus on helping women find the right life partner, get married, and understand themselves.
  • Healing is crucial for building healthy relationships, as unresolved issues hinder progress.
  • Negative experiences, if not processed, lead to projecting past hurts onto current relationships.
  • Lack of healing can sabotage relationships, even with useful dating tools and tips.
  • Unhealed individuals may push away real love due to fear and past hurts.
  • Women tend to run away more from vulnerability in relationships due to emotional investment.
  • Men often latch onto great connections but may not handle insecurities well, contributing to issues.
  • Personal experiences and natural gift of understanding people's emotions contribute to relationship expertise.

02:08:43

"Building Strong Relationships Through Connection and Balance"

  • Emotional reactions should be avoided in relationships, allowing time for processing before responding.
  • Connection is crucial for a successful long-term relationship, going beyond initial excitement.
  • Connection is innate and cannot be forced, often recognized quickly if emotionally healthy.
  • Many people rationalize red flags in relationships, leading to long-term dissatisfaction.
  • Balance, not just equality, is essential in relationships, complementing each other's strengths and weaknesses.
  • Connection leads to better communication and understanding, creating a balanced relationship.
  • Attraction is necessary for a relationship to transition from platonic to romantic, maintaining physical chemistry is vital for a lasting bond.
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