How To Get Kids To Listen Without Yelling

Live On Purpose TV12 minutes read

Children can condition parents to respond in specific ways, leading to a cycle of behavior. Yelling at kids is discussed as a behavioral reinforcement rather than a punishment.

Insights

  • Children can condition parents to respond in specific ways, leading to a cycle of behavior, where the parent's frustration often escalates until they raise their voice to get a response.
  • Encouraging children to think and offering them choices can be an effective strategy to establish communication and behavioral patterns that are more positive and constructive, rather than resorting to yelling as a form of reinforcement.

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Recent questions

  • How do kids and pets influence each other's behavior?

    Kids and pets can train each other in certain behaviors, similar to how dogs and owners influence each other. This mutual influence can create a cycle of behavior where children condition parents to respond in specific ways, leading to certain patterns of interaction.

  • Why do children sometimes ignore parents until they yell?

    Children may ignore parents until they yell due to conditioning and learned behavior. A common scenario is illustrated where kids only respond after a single dad with multiple children reaches a breaking point and raises his voice. This frustration stems from the kids waiting until the parent yells to act, showcasing the impact of behavior patterns.

  • Is yelling at kids an effective form of punishment?

    Yelling at kids is discussed as a form of behavioral reinforcement rather than a punishment. The act of yelling can inadvertently train children to respond differently, emphasizing the importance of setting real consequences early in interactions with children to avoid relying on yelling as a default method of communication.

  • How can parents establish effective communication with children?

    Parents can establish effective communication with children by giving them two choices, both of which the parent is okay with. By controlling one of the choices to establish a default option, parents can encourage children to think rather than fight in interactions. This approach aims to turn words from "garbage" to "gold" in communication, fostering a more positive and constructive relationship.

  • Where can valuable advice on parenting be found?

    Valuable advice on parenting, including strategies for effective communication and behavior management, can be found by subscribing to Live On Purpose TV. This resource offers insights and guidance on navigating the complexities of parent-child relationships, providing tools for fostering healthy interactions and promoting positive behavior patterns.

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Summary

00:00

"Kids and Pets Influence Behavior Cycle"

  • Kids and pets train each other in certain behaviors, similar to how dogs and owners influence each other.
  • Children can condition parents to respond in specific ways, leading to a cycle of behavior.
  • A story is shared about a single dad with multiple kids who only respond after he yells, showcasing a common scenario.
  • The dad's frustration stems from his kids ignoring him until he reaches a breaking point and raises his voice.
  • The dad's question about why his kids wait until he yells the twelfth time to act is analyzed.
  • The importance of setting real consequences early in interactions with children is highlighted.
  • Yelling at kids is discussed as a behavioral reinforcement rather than a punishment.
  • A strategy is suggested to give children two choices, both of which the parent is okay with.
  • The concept of controlling one of the choices to establish a default option is explained.
  • Encouraging children to think rather than fight in interactions is emphasized, aiming to turn words from "garbage" to "gold" in communication.

14:25

"Yelling at Kids: Train Them Differently"

  • Yelling at kids trains them to respond differently.
  • Subscribing to Live On Purpose TV for more valuable advice.
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